Let’s chat about RSVPs. If you are planning your wedding or have planned a wedding, you probably know where I’m going with this.
Let’s paint a picture…
You’re recently engaged and on cloud nine. You put the ring on your finger and the following thoughts are exactly this,
“I can’t wait to start planning!”
“I FINALLY get to bring my Pinterest boards to life!”
“We’ve got to start designing our invitations?”
“What is our theme going to be?”
“What colors should we use?”
Etc. etc. etc…
So you start planning. You start designing your invitations. Your guest list is complete. You know who you are going to invite.
As you’re crafting your invitations, you are filled with excitement knowing how many people are going to want to be there to celebrate this big day with you. Your creative mind is flowing with so many ideas and you can’t wait to share it with your guests.
Then the day finally comes. It’s time to mail those invitations.
You send them off and wait patiently to hear from your peeps!
A week goes by…two weeks go by…three weeks go by…then months go by…and now you’re one month from the big day and you still haven’t heard from some guests.
The struggle is real, my friend. As a bride to be myself, I totally get this!
So what do you do?
You don’t want to be the ‘bridezilla’ who is constantly reaching out to guests asking for their RSVPs, but the planner inside you needs a final count so you can finalize details with vendors, make final payments, and ensure you have enough supplies for all guests. I get you. I hear you. I’m with you.
There are a few ways to go about doing this. I’m going to break it down for you from start to finish and give you some steps to take to get those RSVPs in your hand.
Before you send out your invitations or save the dates, create a Facebook event page for your wedding. This can be a Wedding Day event page or a Save the Date event page. However you wish to set it up.
Invite everyone you are sending invitations to (who are on Facebook). This will get the word out about your wedding, it can save you hundreds of dollars on Save-the-Dates, and people will know what is to come.
Once you have created the Facebook event page and have invited all of your peeps, send out that first message on the page. Get creative and let people know they should expect invitations in the mail soon!
Naturally, people will send their potential RSVP on the Facebook event page. They receive a notification on their device and immediately have the option to select:
· Can’t Go
You can use this to start drafting your tentative guest list. It’ll give you a head start for planning purposes.
Before you seal up that last invitation, take a pretty picture of it and post it on the Facebook event page. Let people know the invitations are being mailed and share the excitement.
When you mail out your invitations, mail yourself one too. That way when you receive it, you know when other people will be receiving theirs as well.
Create an excel spreadsheet to start tracking your RSVPs. If you have a wedding website, you can have people RSVP there as well. I don’t always trust technology and the internet and would prefer to have my own copy for safe keeping. It’s all personal preference.
Whatever works for you.
Once a month send exciting news about the wedding on the Facebook event page. Post about the planning process. Build the excitement. The more they see you in their newsfeed, the more likely they will be to remember to RSVP.
Adults are like children sometimes. They need to be constantly reminded.
One month from the RSVP deadline, check in with those who have not RSVP’d. All you have to do is kindly ask if they will have the opportunity to attend the wedding.
Now be prepared – expect responses like this,
“I thought I had until DATE?!”
“When do you need to know?”
“Can you give me some time? I’m still waiting to hear from X.”
You name it, you’ll get excuse after excuse. And I get it, you can only handle so much.
You’d think ‘if they want to go, they should know if they can go. They can reschedule that ‘thing’.’ At the end of the day, it is what it is.
Some couples need a final guest count by a specific date per venue guidelines and if guests don’t get back to them in time, they are out of luck.
My advice: do the best you can. Consistently follow up. If they choose to not respond until it’s too late, then unfortunately, that is on them.
If you are a guest, it is common courtesy to RSVP as soon as possible. Don't wait until the deadline. Unfortunately, it's common that most people simply don't understand guest etiquette. So I'm here to tell you - send that RSVP as soon as you can.
FINALLY (for all my couples out there)
Take a deep breath. It will all work out. It’s just getting through these little hurdles. There is light at the end of the tunnel. I promise.
Now go hound your guests ;)